Accidentally on Purpose

 For those who follow my blog or my BrainFit Facebook page, you know that my focus on Improv is not comedy or performance. My emphasis is on Improv for Life, whether it be for spiritual growth, personal improvement, or for leadership skills. All of life is Improv. You may think you have a plan and you've got it under control, but we all know life throws us curveballs and we need to be agile and learn to pivot. We simply rely on the basic rule of Improv "Yes, and..." That means I accept the situation, what I've been dealt, and then build on it to make something better. Accidents come along and we define them with purpose.

This is why I was drawn to this memoir by celebrity chef, Kristen Kish. Kish won the title of Top Chef on season 10 of that show. I am a huge foodie and I've watched every episode of Top Chef. And I also have to admit that Kristen is one of my all-time favorite winners. When she came out as a queer woman, I loved her even more. 

Kristen, in her memoir, shares her story of all the "accidents" that have happened in her life. She was born in Korea and adopted by a white family in Michigan. She had a normal American childhood with a happy family and a great career. But none of that was part of some huge plan of hers. As she wrote about her travels as a chef, every time she would go into a new country she couldn't help but wonder, "What if I was adopted into this world?" At every turn in her schooling and career, little "accidents" moved her along her journey to be the chef she is today. At any turn, the slightest change couldn't have produced unlimited different possibilities. What was consistent, was her ability to say, "yes, and." She said yes to opportunities, even when she was scared or felt insufficient to the task. Sometimes she succeeded and sometimes she stumbled. But just like in Improv, we learn more from our mistakes than our successes. We learn to face the fear and lean into the process. My biggest advice when facing failure, fail often but fail forward. If we don't stretch, we don't grow. 

At the end of her book, Kristen writes, "Back when I was eighteen, I thought I was starting my adult life with purpose when in fact I was often trying to be in control. Accidents - or anything that would indicate a lack of control - would have been terrifying to me. I had too much to lose, but I've since learned the difference between control and agency. You can be open to 'accidental' developments, to rerouting your course - sometimes even in the absence of a map - without relinquishing your agency. If you accept and embark upon that new course and do wo with commitment, devotion, and intention, it becomes your own decision - one made in collaboration with the universe, the world, and the communities around you." 

This is a well written memoir about a truly interesting person. If you're a foodie,  or watch Top Chef, or are simply interested in Improv for Life, then read this book. Not all books about Improv need to be about Improv Games.